Cleanse...

Because we have these promises, dear friends, let us cleanse ourselves from everything that can defile our body or spirit. And let us work toward complete holiness because we fear God.   (2 Corinthians 7:1)

Last week I could sense in my spirit that I just needed - and wanted - to pull away from all that was going on.  School has begun, fall activities with the church and the kids have started, and I was once again connected to a device more than I was a little hand or two.  I was in the midst of my Thursday, I believe, when my dear friend Pam texted me to let me know she'd be "off-line" for a few days to commune with God.  I was once again delighted how God confirms His leading for me, and I replied back that I was joining her!

Saturday night Nathan and I went out to eat and to a movie.  While at dinner, he shared what God was teaching him, and quite frankly he felt it hadn't been much lately.  But, one verse did stick out - 2 Corinthians 7:1.  "Let us cleanse ourselves..."  Once again, God being God, He confirmed this decision of mine to back off and let go and it seemed He would be leading Nathan to do the same - probably not in the same ways, but cleansing nonetheless.

I'm really just at the beginning.  There have been small things that I've done or done without. I've decided to make healthier meals and though I know this isn't always necessary for a cleansed soul, sometimes, well, it is.  I let go of the electronic social "stuff" completely for a few days and then have only added them back at a minimum.  (Do I even need to say it?  FREEDOM!)  I am about to record my 5,000th gift in my gratitude journal.  Can't believe it has been five years!  I'm drinking a lot of water and a bit of coffee.  I'm allowing the quiet to serenade me more than usual.  I am smiling with contentment at the little (wonderful, rich, beautiful, simple) life I've been given by my Father.  I am seeking to give and love more and taking more baby steps in that direction of living.  I am getting rid of the extras that are lying around and then going back to look for more!

I am praying that God develops the fruits of peace and gentleness in me.  And just this morning I prayed a prayer for Nathan and I that will truly be a testament of God's miraculous working in our lives if one day it comes to pass.  (I prayed. I hope. I trust.)  I am asking like never before for the "affection of Christ Jesus" for all in my life, from my family to my friends to my cashiers to the kids in kids' church and on and on...  I am asking that God calm down the noise in my head and spirit and life (!!), that He refocuses me, and that He helps me trust Him for the next step.  I am praying to live with a gentle and quiet spirit, simply trusting and obeying rather than striving and stressing and rushing into things.  I'm hoping to learn to take intentional steps and say intentional words and think intentional thoughts instead of all the mess I've been drowning in.  (Sometimes life brings the mess, but I'm talking about the kind I stir up all by myself.)

I am hoping that my children will see more of my face - and a smiling, hopeful one at that - instead of my hair sticking up behind some screen.  I want to hear my children and my husband and myself laughing and discussing instead of the sound-effects of games and soundtracks of movies.  I want to feel the sun and breeze on my skin instead of the house fans.  I want to be content to sit and hold my babies and cuddle and read and tickle instead of feeling like we need to be "doing" something.

I know we're all prone to saying, "Out with the old and in with the new," but I'm actually thinking of revisiting some of the old and setting aside some of the new.  I am feeling no one-size-fits-all kind of thing here.  My details aren't necessarily anyone else's; though, I kind of hope God will lead both Nathan and I in many of the same areas.

We are working really hard to pay off the last of our debt, and I mentioned to Nathan that I think it's a good time for him to begin setting other jobs go to free himself up fully for the ministry God has him here for.  For whatever reason, I just feel that as soon as things are payed off and outside jobs are let go, He has something in store for us.  No idea what but something, and I'm quietly excited about it  and anticipating it.

These are a lot of prayers and hopes; I have a feeling there will be more. (smile)  I am thankful that my God knows me and delights in the girl He made 32 years ago.  (Yes, I see myself very much still a girl; I don't think I ever refer to myself as a woman...)

I look forward to the days ahead, but first, I look forward to spending time with my Ruthie and then the other four returning from school!